The lack of it

They appeared
in those days
as a feeling

and finished
I felt them.

I knew when a poem
was coming through
because of the pain

my head would be bursting
for days on end
and then a poem
worked better than pills.

Sometimes, thankfully
I’d get a weird gut feeling
and I knew
I felt
and I wrote.

Now I’m on different pills
so my blood isn’t boiling
my head isn’t bursting
and my gut isn’t feeling
so often

but neither is the poetry

(except for this 3am sleepless drivel!)

Coincidence, or Nature at Her Best?

For a while now I’ve had some health problems and a couple of weeks ago I was prescribed medication to help.

Now I’m not after any sympathy or ought like that as I don’t generally talk about stuff like this but I just wanted give the reason for this post and introduce the power of nature to listen to us and reply in her own way.

As far as I could tell the medication helped but came with headaches of the ridiculous kind. 12 hours a day for 7 days and it said they go away after a week or two. On the 7th day I could take the pain no longer as each day seemed worse than the previous and on that day I was in tears. I just could not move without the pain cutting me short and making me quite dizzy and unstable. Needless to say I am no longer on that medication and am now all good except of course the aforesaid health problems which should be sorted in a month or two.

*

I always talk to my house plants, I have a nice Weeping Fig; Ficus benjamina and a lovely Dragon plant; Dracaena marginata and quite a few Peace Lilies; Spathiphyllum.

On the 6th day of the pain I could barely move without my head feeling like it was being attacked with even more hot stabbing pokers or needles. My body was getting stressed and I gradually became quite hot. I didn’t know what to do as pain killers just bounced off the pain even the ones the doctors prescribed.

So I put my faith in Nature and my plants because a while back I read that plants are aware of our thoughts (Caretakers of the Cosmas by Gary Lachman and Secret Life of Plants by Peter Tompkins & Christopher Bird).

The sky was clear and blue without a cloud and the weather unseasonably warm. As I said I was getting stressed and rather hot so I sat in front of the Dragon plant and with both hands wrapped around its trunk I asked for help. I just sat and asked and asked. I sat there for about 30 minutes or so and then all of a sudden the sky changed and for about the next ten minutes it hailed! Lots of nice cold hail stones fell and my room temperature dropped. It was just perfect. I stood and watched it and as I cooled and relaxed I smiled and thanked her.

My headache was still as painful but I was much cooler and more relaxed.

Nature at her best?

I’ll let you decide, but for me the universe, she, came to my rescue.

Be strong

***

Around each weakness
is another weakness
waiting to be turned into a strength
as sometimes we have to do
what’s right for ourselves.

Just because it hurts
doesn’t mean you have to feel it.

Be strong, be patient, be you
no matter what.

***

Crushing butterflies

Those clouds
heavy with rain
resembling pain
sit up there
and just, utter their contempt
as they shuffle along
manifesting

while down here
pain resembles snow
with its weight
pushing, tugging; silencing life

crushing butterflies
till they themselves
become misty rainbows
when the sun breaks through

Freedom comes from loving what is

I believe
in the something within us

I believe
we can be better than yesterday

I believe
pain comes when it is needed

I believe
in the realization of being

I believe
another word for peace is chaos

I believe
chaos is another word struggle

I believe
we have yet to find the four corners of our jigsaw

I believe
in love’s natural state of naked awareness

I believe
the skin of age is equal to the trickle of knowledge

I believe
in the scent of passion

I believe
that one day, we shall accept our failings

I believe
freedom comes from loving what is

I believe
in you