Sitting here watching a spider as it’s being blown by the wind while continually building its web.
It falls againt my window, gets blown about and dangles but time and again it carries on its repairs.
It’s a thing they do and not just the spiders but all those creatures out there. They just do stuff oblivious to life and its reasons.
They feel, but not in the same sense we feel as humans with our compassion and hatred, our anxieties, empathy and those maddening questions of life and the reality of it all, the reasons of being, of time and of religion and all those things we have no control over.
The spider is there still doing its thing and I’ve forgotten how to be something other than a failure.
If I just carry on regardless while being buffeted, and with those turbulent feelings in my gut of fear, love and something other that i can’t explain then maybe time will come to my rescue.
Perhaps the universe, in her wisdom, has a message for me in the spider, and as I write these last words the sun breaks through and I realise sometimes there is nothing we can do to change or to help so we have carry on while trying to bring our own light upon the world.
My laptop is working again, but I’m not sure how long it’ll last so at some point I’ll need to buy a new one.
Apart from the laptop being busted I think I have been too. I know I’ve done this before but I’m doing it again and deleting my social media accounts. Facebook went in January and today I’m deleting my Twitter and Instagram accounts.
I don’t spend much time interacting on those platforms apart from the occasional poem on Twitter and uploading photos of what I’m reading or just general stuff including some of my writings to Instagram. I spend more time scrolling life away and not connecting with folk as I’m not all that good with the social side of things so it’s time for them to go.
This of course means I’ll have more time to spend here on WordPress, or at least that’s the plan.
Thanks for your continued support.
I’ve had a lovely review from Betty for my latest poetry book, Pregnant with Death.
Thanks chockymuch, Betty 🙂
And flip. The reason I’m quiet on here at the moment is because my laptop has died and I don’t like to use this WordPress app on my phone too often. It’s just so finicky to operate.
The laptop has had a good life (about 12 years old) and has seen me through some experiences, helped me publish six books and we’ve made many friends through WordPress over the years.
So hip hip hooray to you my friend and farewell.
Hopefully it won’t be too long before I find a replacement but these things can take time as there’s so many out there nowadays!
Thanks again, Betty!
This morning I was quite late getting up for work (luckily I made it in time), my alarm goes off at 4am then 4.05 and 4.10. Generally I get up on the last alarm but this morning I fell asleep again and slept till 4.40! and I have to be in at 5
Now, what made me wake at 4.40 and not sleep till 6 or later (ah what a thought!)? As I get up every work day at 4.10 it is ingrained in my body clock to naturally wake but not this morning and as I have been quite tired these past weeks I reckon my clock thought it would give me a rest.
Anyhow, the reason for this rather strange blog post is that this morning at 4.40 I woke, not by my own body clock but by a voice somewhere in my mind.
It was a lady’s voice and it said “Martin, come on Martin.”
I was puzzled but dashed out of bed, said thank you to whoever it was, and so the day began.
What I want to know is, where did the voice come from and who was it?
On the way to work I noticed it was a full moon and sometimes these full moons do affect me which was probably the reason I overslept. But doubtful it was the moon speaking!
So who was it?
I have heard my name called before in my mind but that was while I was awake and as a rule I don’t hear anything (or see anything) in my mind anyhow so I’m perplexed but thankful for a “friend”.
Why am I so relieved? It’s because I’ve found a file I thought had vanished.
My laptop has been blowing a storm for a while now and has crashed several times and I’ve had to reinstall Windows a couple of times too. After this last crash it’s been working for a few weeks but still blows like me climbing a mountain!
Anyhow, I lost a file which contains over 300 of my little poetic quotes which sometimes pop into this coal house of a brain of mine. And yes I have everything backed up to a portable harddrive but the file was missing from there too … until a few minutes ago.
I operated a particular search on the documents folder for the word ‘teddy’ and there it was nestling all laid back and eating a honey sandwich in the company of a totally random folder which of course I hadn’t looked in as it would take me ages to open every folder.
So during one of these crashes the file must’ve been moved by the system for reasons of its own divising, so
Oh busy busy me! They say things come in threes!
My new poetry collection is coming along nicely. I very much like the proof copy but have found some typos etc.
I have the title for my next poetry collection and dare I say it here but I have the theme too … it will predominantly be a book of nature poetry.
This afternoon I have been working on the third collection of my Little Thoughts books and that also is coming along nicely and I have the title too.
Now it’s time for food!
An update on the new book.
Manuscript uploaded and cover images created. I’m rather happy with the cover and as the new collection of poetry is on the dark side the cover reflects this.
I’m not going to give the title yet, not until I have the proof copy in my hand and I’ve had a good look at it.
That’s all for now.
Thanks for reading and thanks for buying my books.